I can't       but I do

Maryam Hooleh

I can't       but I do
I do           but I can't
what a selection of strife     is my life!!
what a stupid life      is my strength!
                            at my half ...

walk in my half!
half of my shame ...
half of my love ...
half of my lie ...

I can't       but I do
I do           but I can't

successfully I repeat my half
exactly I'm all of my many halves ...

come near ...    to me
come to one of my parts!
with another part of my lie       I love you!
with another part of my love    I lie to you!

bring me back     to my first part
I don't know myself!
myself is scared of me ...
go back please!
         and take my first part
          give it to me!
oh ... my mirror!
go back please!

We are leaving each other

                   In smiles and kisses

                    Our snares and snakes

We are living in our leaving

                           Our putting down our loves

                            Our taking up our figures

Our kissed streets oh god !

Our haunt of lies

25/april/2004

The window doesn’t see here in !

The beetle in my shoes

Let my home walk  ....    with it’s small foots …

He respire all of homes of these many cities    in your boot  …

Maybe somebody … in a small room … has inculcated his foot in his boot …

                                                                   Has killed a beetle …

We are defective story of this walls

Writing again    is not nobody’s job …

Don’t look !

Hold the window !

the bathroom is a badroom !

when I'm easy to burn ...  he washes me hard !

when I'm easy to cry ... he loses me his trust !

oh ! my sea ! you were too small !       I could finish you !

why are you following me yet ?!

I'm here , washed and hard  ...      without repeat and pity ...

please be new !

let me wash you !

I need a bigger water ...

just my head ... free my mind ...

and someone sitting in my heart ...

who can wash all of me ?!       you ?!!!

                                            my little bathroom !!?

be cool with your walls , with your bath ...

you can not do it !

just follow me now !

maybe I'll be bloody ...

follow me now !

maybe I breathe ...

just follow me now !

22/april/2004

Return to me

Return to me !

Let the  treason  reverse it's face !

The opposed elements are 2 obverse sides of the coin

Strictly this moment       when I'm the lover !

 In my soul

In my soul      ...     stars are crazy

                             falling is crazy ...
and the earth knows good that crazy parts are delicious ...
                                                           why all creatures gape kindly
on the earth

the jail

not can go ahead ,
not can go back ,
not can go anywhere ...

nobody to saying ,
nobody to hear ,
nobody to love ,
nobody to hate ...

this is a part of death,
a long death in the life

I'm crazy , I know it .
I can live like a human but I cannot ...

I'm not calm ...

I wish I hadn't this body ,
I wish I was anything because I can do anything
in this world , but I can not see it
because usually I'm here in myself ,
without a language to say what I have to say .

there is not any language ,
not just for me, for all !

but I have been very tired ...

my heart is too sick !

-edited by Roger Humes-