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 Inferno, Inc.

Maryam Hooleh

Translator : Dr.Ahmad Karimi Hakkak

 

 

 

 

 

 

You have accepted it

accepted

heedless they whirl in the wind – daily incidents . . .

 

“That shameless decrepit man, did he remove his elephant body off your customs?”

“No, not yet! no end to my cigarettes . . .

                                                                 puff by puff, I burn. . .!”

 

Fall according to some law, dear incident, just as you walk

people’s dreams and realities . . .

breakables from up there, unbreakables here on the earth

this encounter with wounds, hysteria and malaria is inevitable. 

 

Pulsate in this civil society’s brain, incident

in the brain of an apartment, on the street, pulsate . . . .

Add a head to the nether parts of urban life

even if it’s ugly and worn out, with a piggish nose

still it’s better than nothing, this inferno, inc. . . .

 

Even if they stuff America in my back-pocket

the urine that’s pressing at me has annihilated my happiness

religion spits all over my bladder non-stop . . .

or is it that my blood pressure is down?

Either way, Mr. Worrisome is pacing downstairs!

 

Beloved incident,

the fact of your following some law throws both my doubts and dogmas into chaos

tell me, where in the scheme of machinations fits a monster called human?

 

Confess, and you have in fact confessed

that an ant’s brain fills you up, on top of the Eiffel

an exile that in the brains of official rats barbecues the meatiest of your thoughts . . .

you run, you heat up

in the brains of the spies . . .

a thin little cell out of your share of the country’s phosphorus . . .

on strange maps, illegible . . .

it runs . . . it boils up . . . it burns . .

runs . . . boils up . . . burns . . . .

 

Run

charge at me, you wild cells of the world

start with the solitary cells

before the party begins, in street uniforms

pasteurize me in a pot of boiling water.

Iron out my protruding parts

cells of fear have turned my curves and creases into a semblance of the world.

pasteurization turns you into smooth and clean books

that turn the world topsy-turvy

when fear turns out to be funny before the crimes of the novel and the television

courage lies nearby, unable to do much . . .

except reseating you from behind your eyeglasses on God’s wheelchair.

 

It’s the silence of the beds that the world fears

because sleep is braver than wakefulness

silence more deadly than scream.

 

Why does inaction fail to support you, why did society?

Choose your opponent: the walls that surround you

turn the city’s lights off, return to the global village of your dreams

that’s where fear and stupidity cannot produce babies

chronic differences of opinion do not deliver happiness from the crack of their

filthy thighs. . . .

 

The stupidity of this dumb peace is the context for my undoing . . . .

In rotten eastern thoughts, in disheveled western tastes

remembering the decrepit face at the glazing height of a dream

in the depth of every leper or blind voice, or before the question inside that death has not                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             dared ask

reviving the memory of pork being served

amid the stench of burning human flesh.

Mary Antoinette the queen

Ain al-Qozat the old philosopher

the professor

throbbing arteries along the neck of the Taleban girl . . . .

Hey, X

hey, hundred to the power of two

hey square root of Alexander!

Subtract my dreams from my days . . . .

 

The bravest of people is the one

who dares to remember as he wakes up.

 

It’s in remembering that the world pulsates

arms are one way to forget

a noisy sort of forgetting we use to retreat to our childhood.

 

Take away my lollypop, little incident

Raise me on the lap of your fascism

so in you I can reach the right to choose.

Rights are meaningless unless you don’t have them

                                                                                       and are facing those who do.

I will not burn you because my roots will turn into ashes

I command you, fascist incident!

Let there be the monster, single-headed and double-eared, upon the earth.

 

It is tough that somewhere in the world Mars should proclaim his prophecy on TV

and somewhere else the plague spit his hysterical laughs on stalls of imported CDs

that in a movie-house somewhere different dances marry each other

so eugenics can work its magic. . .

yet on our little alley the first century Hegira, fat and lazy,

should still contemplate the question of borders and termites . . .

and inside its brain you,

holding a bow and arrow, wearing hot pants under your black chador  

                                                                                                                                   should still run, get hot, burn. . .

                                                                                                                                                                              run, get hot, burn. . . .

Are you  accepting this? 

 

Hum! Mani! Pah! My! Huh!

Yahaa!

Make it snappy!

Sparrows have sprouted in your ears, now you can hear ma as I rale!

Morning, you are there in my breakfast

                      I dare and I remember.

Besides me and the words I have consumed – with joy, with the ruler, and with pain –

there are other things next to my breakfast

                      I dare and I remember.

 

My bits of luck got stuck in the desert

ever since the day they hopped into my thin female car.

Now, men and slogans 

will make no difference to my gas tank’s condition.

No longer can making a revolution or migrating

stop this little machine growing up.

It is approaching thirty now, but the desert is still the desert.

It is about to become a grandma

yet she wraps hot sand in dainty boxes, for her grandchildren,

Inferno, inc!

 

I am not sure if it is the ace of spades or a dictator that hides in my pocket

you know

hungry folks can hide anything in their pockets

in place of coins and dry bread!

But the sounds of their missiles shrieking comes up from deep inside my pockets

and the stench of the latrine and tear gas

has seeped into my clothes so much

it makes lovemaking difficult.

 

Aha, incident, lawful little incident:

Fess up – this last fetus you aborted, wasn’t that love!

The stench of blood rolled in rotten dirt, caught in the mouths of alley cats 

That’s enough to turn the city folks on!

The smell of blood in a tennis racket, in women’s chadors, inside men’s beards

at Salman Rushdie’s execution

in made-to-order poems

in mail-ordered brides.

The stench of blood in me, inside me still carrying so much blood

in the folds of my words, still living and livid

through the ordeal of life, about to give up the ghost!

And the desert is still the desert . . .

 

Inferno, inc!

Tell me, does the baton help the dead live again?

This baton has been brainwashed

Surely it is the most pious Muslim on earth

                                                                 no doubt about it

the reason, no dialog with this one!

You can only make room for a baton

the squares and the peddlers roaming through them have left no room for fight-or-flight.

The banknotes they are supposed to shove up the schools’ nether parts

the checks that are supposed to provide arrows

leading from the alleys to the squares and the peddlers . . . .

 

No

the more I change

the more society makes a claim to being like me

go on hopscotching, take care not to fall

for the gods, this is their natural rights

forgive me if I once beat you in that game

it was only a local little game, by accident, with divine help

limping along does you good at times!

 

They are right

For the trembling soul her words resemble frog figurines,

about to give up the ghost  

more sleep will not pacify my little life.

 

Look well at these deserted temples

at the breasts formed by the ashes

that ought to take care of your street smarts!

the tooth-bites left by the rat of leftover foods

have made a cavern of eternal pain in their granite hearts,

feet that need no hands, without an exhausted brain

hands that need no feet . . . .

Serve grapes grown on the branches of your no-rights!

Play marbles, maintain your balance

image of a deadly hell . . . .

Illusions of a century, caught between two mirrors,

the crackling coal of the condemned. . . .

 

Molten lead in the middle of the dialog. . . .

am I any different from the paper that Danton read?

Rights, rights, rights. . . .

“What is left of the rights?

Wow, is that all?

I don’t care whose corpse this is, it is still scary!

Doesn’t matter whether it’s my right or yours,

I don’t want it, and you don’t either.”

 

Sometimes speaking nonsense helps add a little to the civilization of justice 

this offering comes from a trembling subconscious to an annihilated consciousness. . . . 

 

Later on, riding in history’s ambulance

I’ll patiently take care of the erection that is the incidental law of this century

for now, just let me die!

After all, only the dead can write the life history of the dead

the living ca n only study

your eyes are not supposed to remain open and see

                      as you are struggling inside the incident!

Usually, you can stare life in the face when you are outside it!

This is what scraps of clocks and newspapers spell out

clearly, legibly, throwing it crumpled all over the dustbin of alleys. . . .

And the desert is still the desert . . . .

 

Feet in the world, head in time

how does this ant stand me stepping on its body?

Caprice is a place where time and space copulate in a crate

                      in the position of, well, beside each other, in one place. . . .

What a tough life,

the ease of the last few gasps must have crushed her teeth.

The pyramids are past animation

the geometry of objects is no cure for the leprosy of gab!

 

Humiliation, this spell of a helplessness

is keeping me alive, for now

nothing was as truthful as this

I am the truth

a double-edged lie that squats in the middle of itself.

Watch your movie, crack the nuts!

Jelsomina wakes up with a crackling noise

put on your pants!

Time for you to get old

the old know how to feel shame

the old are professional bearers of shame

only with the old can you have human relations

I have woken up

have put on lipstick

today the street looks more civilized than it did yesterday

when this old-fashioned immigrant would only look at his refugee status in Europe

as the difference between yellow and brown sheep.

Issue me a citizenship card, heavens

my teeth are falling faster than rich professional geezers!

 

Lawful incident in the coroner’s office. . .

lawful incident in the tight virginity of circumcised girls

who have been deleted from all dreams

in the flaccid Turkish delight hidden inside a potbelly suit.

in the taxicab that has embellished the desert

in a sea that serves itself pork

and on top of corpses of curious humans they treat themselves to rocks and oysters!

 

Incidentally, did my baby swallow an incident instead of a marble

or was it in fact a marble he swallowed? 

(After I have gotten rid of it, all the logical pieces, in the same holy order, will still make me throw up, just so I can be sure I am still alive. . . .) 

 

My dear cellmate!

After you have collected your clothes from the clothesline

think a little while about the filth that is gone forever

the stench. . . .

Think of the flower you gave your lover

the shampoo you used to wash your baby’s hair

tales that disappeared forever, after each reading. . . .

 

Once

upon a time

in an age that was modern, this breakfast that is no longer there.

“Who can say infidelity is antagonistic to God?”

“Are you sure religion is not an enemy of human beings?” 

What good is knowing or not knowing?

The important thing is that these things exist

And as for antagonism to God

or enmity toward humans

Which is more harmful?

Easy – the one that is more palpable. . .

reach out and touch! 

pull my leg and touch!

 

I have reversed course, taken another path

all kids grow up with the straight engine that goes in reverse

and still no circle was closed.

 

Dots were far separated by the distance between the heavens and the earth

and the question was not between the heavens and the earth

it was which one, the heavens or the earth!

Who am I?

And what has the circle to do with me?  (So the desert would be a cutie or a cunt?)

 

Wow!

As the incident was becoming lawful

It was turning into a son of a bitch too!

Reality turns the torrent of your babies into a droplet

and how would you answer them, Lady Cloud, when they grow up?

Will you shed rains over them?

Do you still rain the rain that makes you sweat?

As you turn into an infidel you open our eyes and see that you have been dry all along!

A time for raining . . .

you are put together from the smoke in the eyes of the passersby!

From the passing of painful laughter

the despair of fuming rigs!

In the desert you are your own optical illusion!

Now, hop off yourself and graze in yourself

never mind

This desert has nothing to graze on.

“And you were never a thing of use to yourself anyway!”

 

Besides, the desert was a classed desert!

One class the hills, another the valleys, one highlands, one lowlands!

And wave upon wave of salty dust!

and dust, and more dust

gusts of dust drafting plans for people.

 

Being modern means when you say something romantic

you should use a station.

With all your words and thoughts, station by station, you must have been afflicted by                                                                                                                                                                                                                              urbanization.

to expect to get off no matter where you get on

and get on again no matter where you get off!

 

The demise of the incident

lawful incident, you are falling, brother

with all the killings, the self-burnings, the plagues

we are reaching the days when you will no longer fall at any point.

You are a man only so long as men have become lawful

unlawful incident is a nonsense!

You have grown old

go mind your business

the fact that I have agreed to even think of you

without seeing your national ID card

is more than you deserve!

 

“Pick boo!”

“Mommy?”

“What is this?”

“A window!”

“And this?”

“A cartoon show!”

“And this?”

“Well, you know

they pulled out the nails of the noblest of our people, clipped them together,

to give us the Third World!

It’s dirty and stained, but it has calcium!

Instead of licking your feet

Now you can stand on your own!

It is more humiliating to be a third class citizen than to be an independent pest!

You can have a president of your own, a country, and a whole system of                                                                                                                                                                                                                                               national oppression!”

“Hum!

I will not grow up

I’m tired of thinking I should become you

why should someone become his mother

being a child makes more of a difference:

all moms are moms, the exact same thing

but I am me, myself

and loving redundant people doesn’t mean I should think of their tongue!”

 

The chair in the trash. . .

The toilet bowl in the tea. . .

what difference does that make to you?

Think of me as your newspaper

Bend a little and I’ll put the load of my news on your back

take it to the dumpsite and empty it

and on our way back,. I’ll drink pasteurized milk from your sweat

and salute regulation-free breakfasts

I will eat this one with her underwear and bra on, under the full moon

the same underwear and bra that have leaped through the loop of crime!

 

“By the way, young man, you never told me

in which newspaper the Milky Way would be annihilated!”

 

Take away my peace so I can live again

burn my plants

demolish my roof

violate my virgin sky

so my skin can crack open

to shed the shell  

it’s in the midst of adversity that people grow!

The stupid ones stay put

the smart smoke that finds its way through the crack belongs to honest atheism!

Powerful people always negate the preceding powerful people to grab at power!

In people’s eyes, clouds, cold and cruelty, a mirror in front of your skin!

Shed that shell!

 

The moment you wish to be a mirror you have multiplied yourself

and before you know it you are a religion

“Don’t do that!”

“Can I do anything else?”

 

Help me on

so I can see whether anything distinguishes human beings as superior

other than remaining separate and serving as a mirror. 

No, never!

The first human was a copy machine of rules

that gave the incident diarrhea

your stomach was not hardened, incident, and we grew old, one by one.

You have held me by the collar so tight

that we escape immortality, at the time of our death

unless it lasts only for fifty years, only on earth. 

 

I am trying to make your wits fly off

let my concentric particles discover my destiny.

Abracadabra!

Spearmint for me, henna for the old hag!

Take this death away from me, leave it at my fetus’s feet!

This blanket force would be a good incentive

for abandoning yourself to life, in a few light seconds

you are the perfect fit for killing time.

Aren’t I right?

Take this shovel from me, give me that candle!

boys for my various outfits

girls for staring at!

Wall me in, a wall of glass would be best

looking like this does a better job of keeping civilization busy

you are in cahoots with wasting time

Aren’t I right?

Poetry, guillotine . . .

fooling around with women . . .

and here’s your wall of glass . . .

 

I have strayed from the path of modernization

it was too acidic

I am now all washed up with it.

Are my smiles ahead, or your collective awe,

                      you who despise madhouses, homeless shelters, and Hitler?

 

Some people are evil machines

Don’t tell me their thoughts!

Even broad beans swell in their tummies so bad

                      you can hear trees shouting for days through their cracks.

Killing time. . .

by spitting out slogans. . .

is so cool!

Aren’t I right?

 

Inside Inferno, inc. evil machines are always fatter

that’s how the desert lets some pass but not others

letting pass is the thing.

Sinking at the edge of the desert, or at its bottom?

The difference is between letting pass and being accepted.

Humans have an inclination to be asses

loving and caressing and munching seeds . . .

Sitting in at a TV show or falling asleep in front of it.

Does it matter where your chair is?

I’m dozing off down here, you up there.

You dram of delivering lashes, I dream of receiving them.

The important thing is when you wake up

you don’t care to remember that you have been violated

nor would you care to remember that you have done the violating.

If you want the truth of it, breakfasts don’t help humans cure themselves

you must think of a better lullaby for tonight

otherwise we’ll both suffer a fall!

 

Worms are not ousted through our hopes

so long as worms crawl in the garden, humans can’t find immortality –

don’t you have a thought, incident?

Your pregnant rules only make more fertilizer for the garden!

                      Cow crap and atomic waste

Wood or cement

Differences in days, differences in duties . . .

 

An accountant must sit apart

On one side accounts of all the urbanization

on the other those of the First World and medicine and Mars.

Count and you’ll see how many real hearts are beating

On real time to make white blood in the brain –

How many hearts?

 

On a wooden bed

in the gutters

under the rock

and the desert machine

how many hearts beat?

“Real hearts don’t beat in sleep, brother!”

You are cool with being an ass

aren’t I right?

And making an ass of us is what geniuses do

worms are not asses and they don’t make an ass of us, they just munch!

We’re talking about hearts that beat in sleep!

 

You are wasting you time, incident!

I know the reason for this conspiracy:

Cinema

the hero wound up by the wind, and who knows things

but as soon as people look and the dialog gets rolling

they go with the wind

not with the one who is doing the talking

not with the talk that is doing the one . . .

 

 

Hit!

Hit!

Please

hit me!

I am stronger than you

because my fantasies always end in my empowerment

and I think that the world is a figment of my imagination!

And you, my other thoughts, who envy me

because there is no way you would be me

because you cannot lie to yourselves

whereas I can.

I lie, therefore I am.

I have thick skin, because I do not believe!

 

Take the away from me, my blonde darling!

I think with black hair

maybe that’s why my thoughts are not pretty, but yours are!

 

Beauty always comes with stupidity

conspiracy and divinity with ugliness . . . .

Gods are formed by undoing and being undone.

When a god falls prostrate before a beauty that has got the power?

This violates the laws, incident!

There’s an evil in you who takes kindness away from us

I think of you in the midst of mountains and forbidden countries.

Cities scare me about you

so power is where two elements encounter.

It is this possibility that decides

not you, not love

not street fantasies

not great expectations –

we are nothing!

Time is the greatest of plaything that entertains us.

The moment you feel bored moments are no more

And you fall down through the crack between the moment before and the moment after.

 

You fall – with the thought of time in your pockets

you tremble from the fall – with your tongue in your eyes.

In this dreadful madhouse of a dungeon

your footsteps become echoes of these words!

 

“The likes of the circle were not a circle, or there wouldn’t be a fall.”

“A circle is a good thing, isn’t it?”

“Yes. You manipulate anyone you wish

and you can be kicked anywhere – here, there, in the park, in the head!”

 

Is death a fall or a flight?

There is no direction in the constellations.

Death is a return to the constellatory absence of rules.

Justice is annihilation

annihilation and equality.

Borders bored you

These days walls and borders are made of glass!

So, what are you waiting for?

Share your longest word with me – after death!

“How is that possible?”

After all, if freedom ends in the glass it will destroy you too

nothing would be visible from behind you, neither opaque objects, nor yourself!

A democracy of glass sees nothing any more

is this annihilation

or pure vision?

A pair of sixes is not always cause for celebration.

I’ll miss the dialog, Cinema!

But when I fly in a vacuum, without tranquilizers and barbiturates

I feel such a pleasure it’s like overcoming the pain of labor

with a few milligrams of morphine, forever,

                                                                                                                                   that’s death!

 

Now let’s get back to the beginning!

Labor pain continues

that’s life!

 

Ears naked

hands naked

how can I buy you love from myself?

People are never as great as when they fall in love or rise to be a politician!

Help them reconcile themselves with this!

 

And then the trains and the tunnels all move in the same direction:

“home!”

Memories of whorehouse windows . . .

Muslims and deserts . . .

Directions and hours . . . .

 

The truth is, the difference between desires

and the time before their fulfillment

is time – and that’s that!

 

“Time?”

Talk to her a little, maybe she’ll relent!

 

Dear plaything!

I lose you as I wind you up!

When I wake up you have already come to, and you are having noise for breakfast.

What am I to do with you, with your alarm bell wind up knob!

If we – and our new daily demands – were not here

you would kill yourself from the boredom of monotony, wouldn’t you?

 

Inferno, inc, is nothing but hollow time

without corpses around, because it has nothing to let rot!

Even our death postpones your no incident . . .

 

Tie me up in my home one day, incident

and let me see if at the end of the day you do not feel depressed.

If I keep you from committing suicide the Milky Way will fall down the ladder

in animation.

                      And my baby, the savior, will yell out: it has fallen!

We decide when you fall

how can you not take care of us?

If my hair were blonde would you have fallen in a different way,

so that every time you fall your hands and legs would not break,

so your wheelchair would not stop working?

 

Ah, incident! this hell in me, my limbs a shirt on its body

this mound of fire, all this cursing flaming forth from my spinal column .. .

ageless me, ancient me, puzzle without answer, with a dying inferno, inc. inside . . . . 

Get out of me!

Smash me to the ground!

Break me so you drop down next to me, again!

 

Ah, incident, incident!

I am ageless, for you have not grown in me

single-cell creatures will not convince me f the passage of time

not through their reproduction.

Believe me and fall in my arms,

                      with a sackful of dollar bills

                      or a man who would not fight me

                      or a country in which kids do not die of old age, in accidents, or by bullets!                 

Then I’ll believe you, and immortalize you!

 

History is my sorrow in a bed where I think of you

Pin your stars to my sky, and I’ll make history’s limbs real!

And then, finally, time will experience the mutual touch, in the hands of a real being.

Three-dimensional cinema . . .

viewers that had turned into sheep

will have turned superhuman.

Then seeing and being seen will become one and the same thing:

a timeless action word!

 

Snore, snore, snore!

Grow big as I puff you up!

This time I have penned your formula incidentally,

Come what may!

I fell in love incidentally

had babies incidentally

was anointed a prophet incidentally,

the pyramids for my breakfast

a pair of flying shoes,

and satellite channels that the Islamic Republic censors,

with a heart that stops working in sleep

with an eye that suddenly opens up

and with my two-year-old

who steals my lighter from inside the kitchen to take the world seriously.

 

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